Gleaning Wisdom

A friend introduced me to a new blog I am growing to love. You can find it in my blog list titled "In all Honesty". The author is Jean-an Australian mother of four and she is a deep well of wisdom. I read something she wrote the other day that has really stuck with me. In her post, she sites Tim Chester's book, You Can Change, as turning her life upside down. She says: "Every time I feel anxious, overwhelmed, discouraged or guilty. When I am tempted to value the praise of others over the praise of God. Or every time I am tempted to put my hope in possessions, pleasure or relationships...every time I am tempted to prove myself through my perfectionism, I turn to the 4G's."
The 4G's are the highlight Tim Chester's book. They are so good, I have to pass them along.
1. God is Great...so we don't have to be in control.
2. God is Glorious....so we don't have to fear others.
3. God is Good...so we don't have to look to ourselves.
4. God is Gracious....so we don't have to prove ourselves.

Every single sin begins with believing a Lie. I love how the kids' Jesus StoryBook Bible explains the origin of the fall. It all began with a lie and we still are suckers for it today...

As soon as the snake saw his chance, he slithered silently up to Eve. "Does God really love you?" the serpent whispered. "If he does, why won't he let you eat the nice, delicious, juicy fruit? Poor you, perhaps God doesn't want you to be happy."
The snake's words hissed into her ears and sunk down deep in her heart, like poison.....
Eve picked the fruit and ate some. And Adam ate some, too.
And a terrible lie came into the world. It would never leave. It would live on in every human heart, whispering to every one of God's children: "God doesn't love me."
*************************************

How true this is for me! I sin, because I believe my happiness can be found elsewhere instead of running to the cross. I worry, because I don't trust His goodness, His character and His Sovereignty. And I fall into despair because I doubt He really loves me and believe the lie that I am an orphan instead of a child of the King. So much grief could be avoided if I will learn to recognize the voice of the lie and turn to the truth of the Gospel.....What a great weapon these 4G's are for me...If only my pregnancy brain can retain them:)

I am thankful for the wisdom gleaned from Jean @inallhonesty. Check it out!

That's My King

This is a clip from a sermon from the great late Pastor S.M. Lockridge. My dad showed it to me many years ago and this one has been updated to include scenes from Mel Gibson's movie The Passion of the Christ. The words and character of God are so powerful....truths I seem to forget so easily. This past Sunday, our Pastor challenged us with the thought or reminder that we are always always in the realm of the Spiritual supernatural only our eyes are too dull to see it. He sighted the scripture from 2 Kings 6 when Elisha was surrounded by a vast army of war horses and chariots from the king of Syria. Naturally, Elisha's people were afraid at what seemed to be their impending destruction. Elisha, however remained confident in the Lord's deliverance and urged them not to be afraid. Next, he prayed that the Lord would please open the eyes of his very worried servant that he may see. "So the Lord opened the eyes of the young man, and he saw, and behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha."

The supernatural army of God armed and ready to do battle on behalf of God's children. I don't know why, but that struck me. I have thought alot about that this week and one of my prayers has been that I would see God's hand in the mundane. After all, if we are constantly dwelling in the realm of the Spirit world....could He...could He possibly be present in my daily toils? The laundry, the diapering, the retrieving of legos from air vents and crayons stuck to a sticky floor. What purpose could my day possibly have that would be big enough to evoke the presence of God Almighty? I don't know. But I do know I experienced Him today in worship through the reminder of who He is in this S.M. Lockridge sermonette. May you watch it and be blessed as well.

That's My King~

Heather

Still Re-forming.

The first week of school has come and gone and we have adopted a new schedule. More than ever, I feel the need to bring order into our little army...to bring some sort of structure to their days. With the baby coming and the reality that I'm drowning in laundry & housework and the fact that my children needing the satisfaction that comes from a job well done, we are hard at work around here! One of my mentors and one of the wisest women I know, always says:

"If you give your children more than they have the capacity to appreciate, you have done them a great disservice." ~Barbara Barker

[Mrs. Barker is a Godly woman who has 3 children and multiple grandchildren who know and walk closely with the Lord. I admire her so very much. Her father taught her this principle and she passed it on to a few of us who met with her for accountability. I have it written on a chalkboard in my kitchen as a constant reminder not to over-indulge them.] Well, I am guilty of over-indulging them and of underestimating their capacity. The result is not pretty. It may not reveal itself in the form of tantrum throwing brats in the store, but it does manifest itself in a "deserving mentality" way of thinking. When you shuck it all down...the root issue is the same. Therefore, we've had to re-form, make some changes around here and turn this train around.

I say all this as a reminder to myself that my goal at the end of the day isn't a clean house, perfect kids, and all laundry done and in its proper place. No. In the role God has placed me, my goal at the end of the day is to have been the best steward of my husband, my children and my house as I can possibly be. And mostly, I fail miserably at that every single day. I get it all wrong. My priorities get switched, goals go unattained, and I end up frustrated and tired. I am short-changing my husband and I am missing it with my kids. I have been given these amazing, kind, funny, respectful and very loving kids. But I have blown it when it comes to teaching them work ethic and personal responsibility. I have nagged and barked at them about cleaning up-and doing "chores" and walked away exasperated- just baffled at why they don't listen and obey. But I can't blame them. Until now, mostly chores or helping around the house has been this nebulous theory that is never carried out or followed through consistently. So. Let me say it again. I have failed big time in this area and for a couple of reasons. One, neither my husband or I are naturally "structured" people. We like to go with the flow and will never turn down an opportunity that sounds more "fun". So we are not consistent and that is key with kids from what they tell me. Second, its so much easier to just do the task myself than take the time to train them...encouraging and guiding them throughout the day! When I do it, its guaranteed to be done quicker and neater. It's a pain to teach, prod, and correct. And last, I really think the biggest reason why nothing's worked for us yet is because we haven't had a plan. Finally, after doing the logical thing and seeking the Lord in prayer about how to best lead our family, I am thankful to say we have a plan!!!! So far, all 8 days of it have worked. Ha! I am seriously praying Prov. 16:3~"Commit your work to the Lord and your plans will be established." Truth be told, without supernatural intervention from the Spirit, this will flop tomorrow. But, for now, we are on a schedule and reaping benefits I never dreamed of. This is what our typical day (without ballet, gymnastics and soccer) looks like.

DAILY SCHEDULE

6:45-Wake up! Eat breakfast

7:00-Make beds. Brush teeth. Get dressed

7:40-Load up! Off to school

1:00- Snack. Homework. Chores.

****Quiet time (read.color.puzzles.craft)****

3:00-Outside time/ Creative play if weather is yuck

4:00-T.V./Wii

5:00-Get ready for supper

****JURISDICTIONS******

5:30ish-Supper and Family Devotion

6:30-Baths and Bedtime Stories

7:30-Prayer and Lights out

Along with each day, we have worked in a time for 3 distinct areas of work. The first is what we call their "responsibilities". These are the everyday expected jobs/activities they are required to do...the non-negotiables. Most of these involve hygiene and basic responsibilities. For example: making beds, brushing teeth, taking vitamins, bringing dirty clothes to laundry, making sure homework/snack/clothes are laid out for school next morning. The goal is to foster initiative and to teach them to take person responsibility.

The next area are their "chores". Each of them have a few age-appropriate jobs to do. Most of their chores do not have to be done daily, but more on an "as-needed" basis. They were decided corporately at a family meeting as we asked each of them what they thought they were good at when it came to helping around the house. (This got our youngest daughter very enthused.) Some examples of chores are; for Jeremiah-collecting trash and taking it out, watering plants, bringing in groceries. Ellie unloads dishwasher, keeps the art cabinet organized (a personal strength of hers) and entertains the baby while I cook. Saddler cleans bathroom sinks (her favorite), wipes off stools or chairs and helps to sort laundry.

The final thing and a surprise hit for us is what we call "Jurisdictions". I divided the house up into 3 major problem areas and each area is known as a jurisdiciton. Each child is assigned a different jurisdiction and they rotate daily. There is the Front Room (entry way and formal living/dining) If this is their designated area, they gather shoes that seem to land by the door, collect toys and random papers and vacuum all downstairs. (This sounds like alot but its the easiest of the jurisdictions....our floors are hardwoods and they like to use the central vac.) Next, there is the Den/Family Room. Here, jobs include gathering toys to the toy basket, making sure everyones stuff is laid out and ready for tomorrow (nothing more than a verbal reminder to each other-more for the sake of them getting used to looking out for each other) and making sure floor is clear and ready to be vacuumed. Last, there's the Playroom. This one is always a doozie as it seems to get demolished daily. But, they pick up toys, put away DVDs/Wii and pick up dress up clothes. With the jurisdictions, we set the rules right off the bat, that when you are assigned that "area", you own it. Whether you got that toy out or not, you pick it up....no matter if those are your shoes or not, put them in the designated spot, and it doesn't take nearly as long when you don't waste time complaining! This was the hardest to sell to them at first, but we've had a few surprise blessings. One, they are more aware of putting things up right away instead of stringing stuff all over the house. Two, they know it's pay now or pay later and what goes around, comes around...the whole Golden Rule principle. And third, it has fostered a sense of team work among them. It is precious to hear them encourage one another and be more thoughtful of their brother or sister. It has already happened where one jursidiciton may have nothing or very little to do and so they are encouraged to go "bless" someone else by pitching in and helping them. The kindness is reciprocated. It been a joy to reap the benefits. For example, today, no one had anything to really "do" because they'd done it little by little all throughout the day and they felt SO much Pride!!! Also, by sticking to this schedule, our family time has been so enriched. When "Dad" gets home, we are ready for playing and laughing and sharing because all work is done. It is so much more peaceful for all of us. Thank you, LORD!!!!

Does this sound nuts? -Yes. I laugh every time I walk by the refrigerator where it's all posted. What are the chances we'll stick to it, especially next week when we have 3 extra-curricular activities on 3 different days?-Ummm. Chances are r-e-a-l slim without the Lord's grace and intervention, but we will roll with it and adjust as the need arises. Has it been as blissful as it sounds?-H to the E to the "L" no! The first 3 days were brutal. But I stuck to my guns, prayed constantly for grace, gentle words, a calm demeanor, and to follow through with firm repercussions if they veered off course. And like I said, I am still amazed at how well it has gone. Children are so impressionable. They adapt easily...they are much more accepting and flexible than I am. SOOOOOOOOO, there you have it. Reformation. It's working for us. And not because I am smart enough to come up with this on my own, but because I believe the Lord was faithful to answer my desperate pleas for wisdom and help when it came to bringing order to our chaos. Tonight, I am tired, but thankful and ready for tomorrow.......................

Family Reform, part 1

Blame it on "nesting", call it a necessity in keeping the family ship afloat. But we are in the midst of a Reformation around here. I've had this crazy urge to plan. out. everything!!!! I am thankful for the desire as it has been an ongoing prayer that the Lord would give me wisdom, direction and order for this place, but this is beyond what I'd asked or imagined. Our evening meals are planned out from now to December. Ridiculous, huh. I am betting we will stick to this about 2 maybe 3 weeks max, but it sure sounds grand! So far, it's been sooo helpful to just have a plan. In my next post, I will share what we've come up with as far as a daily schedule and how we've divided chores. For tonight, here's what's for dinner this week!

Chicken spaghetti
Spinach and strawberry salad with Mandarin oranges and blue cheese
Banana Pudding

Chicken Stew with biscuits
Fresh fruit salad
(thanks, Courtney! This was so good, but whew, it wore me out. It's basically a chicken pot pie with homemade biscuits.)

Sloppy Joes
Baked beans and fresh veggies with ranch dip.
Grapes

Taco Soup w/blue tortillas and cheese
cookies

Blackened Chicken Alfredo
Asparagus
Garlic Bread

This has been a great money and time saver for our crew. All of these, with the exception of Barefoot Contessa's Chicken Stew w/biscuits were super fast and easy. I would LOVE to hear some favorite go-to's of your family and what works! Thanks!

High Heels and Milkers

I've said many times before that I feel like I go through my days in this funny paradigm I call the mommy dance. It consists of a two-part step of wanting to hold onto the precious days/times of my little people contrasted to wishing/hoping/praying for bedtime to HURRY UP! I am holding on with one hand and pushing them forward with the other. The time will go all to quickly...of that, I am painfully aware. In the meantime, I am poking through the day battling frustrations and impatience while snatching up sweet memories and pieces of hysterical conversations. One transpired tonight.
***Before I share it, let me give you some context. When I brought home our 3rd born, my oldest was three and the middle was 17 months. This made a breast pump a necessity. Upon the numerous questions, the best explanation Cord could give was that mom was busy "milking". (I know! So barbaric...as if I didn't feel enough like Bessie the cow.) HENCE, in my family, my girls came to refer to our female upper body parts as "milkers". Lovely, isn't it. Sorry-TMI.

Anyway. Tonight, Ellie was overheard sharing with Saddler that her "milkers" were getting bigger. (Yeah,right. She's the most petite 6yr old ever) Saddler encouraged the discovery by telling her they were soon gonna be like Mommy's. The next question caught me off guard:

"Momma. When am I gonna get a bra?" (what! I didn't even know she knew what one was, much less the name of it!)

"Well, when you get older and you need one, I guess."

"Like when I am in big school? Well, what about this teacher at my school. I don't think she gets to wear one because she doesn't have milkers even though she's grown up. I hope I'm not like that!"

"I'm sure she (insert name of teacher) wears one, Ellie, she's just very tiny and thin and maybe you don't see it. But. God has made your body beautiful and special and He will make it grow when it's time."

"Oh, so why do people wear bras who don't have milkers?"

"To protect a lady's chest and to be modest, I guess."

"I get it! Just like the air cushions that pop out of a car in a wreck, huh, momma?!"

"Sure. Now go to bed."

"Momma, answer one more question for me. When do I get to wear high heels? Not the sharp pointy ones like you have but "clip clops" with the strap like the 3rd graders have at church?"

"Oh, Ellie. You have the rest of your life to be a grown up and wear high heels and have milkers, but never again can you go back to being a little girl. Let's just enjoy being 6 for now. Can we read a bedtime story....?"

High heels and milkers today, no telling what it will be tomorrow. Slow down, clock! Let me enjoy them while I can!!!

Road Trips and Reality

The last days of summer have officially drawn to a close around here. I don't know where the time went...besides the fact I slept walked?? through most of it in a queasy pregnancy stupor. For the last "Hoo-rah", we took quick trip to Atlanta to celebrate Ellie turning 6. For her birthday, she got to choose between a party or going to the American Girl Store in Atlanta. Obviously, she chose the latter. What started out as a girls trip ended up as a family event. Cord, Jeremiah and Judson endured 3 painful hours in that place. Bless their hearts. In all seriousness, it was magical. We had the whole experience...dinner reservations in the Bistro, (complete with chairs for the dolls and pink muffins) a much needed trip to the "salon" (seriously, after the lice outbreak last year I nearly burnt those dolls up in the dryer....i also "treated" the doll hair JUST IN CASE...needless to say, it was money well-spent) and finally, an overnight stay in a hotel geared for American Girl visitors. Sounds fun, huh? It was-like I said-magical for a moment! Their little faces were priceless, their hearts-so appreciative, and their imaginations were in overdrive. We explored every inch of Northpoint mall, rode the carousel and played in the playground until we couldn't possibly play anymore. Then it was off to the hotel for the "icing on the cake" to the whole trip. The Marriott Residence inn has a package boasting of pink decor, special beds for the dolls and even cookies and milk at bedtime for all. We could hardly wait. I had arranged ahead of time for a 2 bedroom suite-adjoining rooms-we did have 4 small children in tow. Just to be safe, I didn't make reservations via Internet, but called the 1-800 number instead so I could speak to a real person and be able to rest assured all of my questions were answered and plans executed. It was just a perfect trip-even Jud did good.....until.

!!!!!!AHEM. Attention. Beware. Proceed with Caution!!!!!!

I heard something like this;"I'm sorry, mam. What did you say your name was? Can you spell that for me. Hmmm. Could your reservation be under any other name? Well. I see. OK. Well, we don't have record of your reservation and we are completely booked. I'm sorry."

"Excuse me?" (please tell me this is a cute little joke for the weary pregnant lady with all the kids) "I don't think I heard you right....I made reservations In Advance over the phone with a Live Person...and, I even gave him my credit card number to hold the room."

I could feel the panic welling up! And yep. It happened. I cried out of frustration and desperation. I proceeded to tell the poor clerk how far we'd driven, that we'd just spent 6 hours at a mall with 3 kids and a toddler and now we are exhausted and ready to crash and have no place to lay our head in the city. She felt really sorry for me. Or thought I might lose it and jump over the counter at any given minute. Thankfully, she made some phone calls and sent us several miles down the road to a step above a roach motel. Being the germaphobe I am, the large Lysol that stays in my car, was emptied in the room....all areas disinfected and the kids thought they were at the Ritz Carlton.

It worked out, but not as planned. (And to the donkey who has my credit card number and didn't do your job...I am praying my heart won't wish bad things for you! OHHH, I hate being taken advantage of.)

All in all, it was a great trip. The store was delightful, the mall was entertaining, and the hotel was fun for the kids. However just the time being together was worth every penny spent and inconvenience tolerated. Our kids had our hearts, our attention and our energy UNDIVIDED for 24 hours and that is a gift no money can buy. Unfortunately, it is extremly rare for them. I am so thankful for the time together and for the laughs along the way. I'll close with my top 3 favorite quotes.

1. Upon entering Atlanta, we passed the MARTA train station. The children thought it was 6 flags and begged to ride it.....we should really get them out more.

2. In the Disney store there was a giant stuffed "Dumbo" elephant. I pointed it out to Saddler who tilted her little head and in a very perplexed tone said, "HUH. And all this time I thought Gumbo was a food...."

3. On the way out we had to stop at a toll road. Peppered with questions about why all the cars stopped, why do you have to pay, etc., the best answer I could come up with was that in Georgia, you have to pay to drive down certain roads. Ellie replied so abruptly, "Well. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" Well said. Well said.

What a blessing to be a mom...to have the opportunity to shape hearts and minds. I adore my family. I am blessed beyond measure and unworthy of every gift.......

We have a big week ahead! School begins! I'm sure there will be stories to tell....Until then, I'm counting my blessings~

Daily questions and comments

We've had a lot of funny comments lately about our expanding family. Most come from strangers in the grocery store or other public locations who laugh in pity as I parade our crew from one errand to another. A few weeks ago the car was due to be serviced. The sweet man at the Toyota dealership took a glance in the van at the empty car seats wondering where everyone was. (Apparently its quite a commotion to watch us change out 4 kids, car seats, bags, sippy cups and get settled into another car while the "grey goose" is serviced)He took one look at my belly and hollered-yes hollered-he's an older gentleman from Alabama-"WEll gaaahhh-leeee! You got another'n commin?!"


Here are some of my favorite questions and comments. I kid you not, I get a least one of these daily.


1.) Are you Catholic? Because my mother/sister/uncle/friend is and they have a whole lot of kids like you.


2.) Are you Mormon or something? (To both of these I respond-no. Just crazy christian. Presbyterian, to be exact.)



3.)Honey! Don't you know how that happens???



4.)And my personal favorite..."Are they ALL yours?" As if Anyone in their right mind would want to take extra kids to wal-mart just for the heck of it!